Friday, January 28, 2005

little Ana and her cast- pants

Poor thing. But it could've been worse. She did break her leg, but it was a clean break that will not require surgery. But she does however have these 'cast-pants' and is nearly immovil. She is staying in my room now because I am on the main floor and it's impossible for her to even walk, let alone climb stairs. She is wearing a diaper, so we don't have to take her to the bathroom... only change the diaper. She is in a lot of pain still and in uncomfortable. We are praying for someone to be able to come on weekends to help take care of her. Plus, I'm leaving in three weeks, so I don't know what they'll do... actually I do. God will provide.

So, please be in prayer for Ana.

Thursday, January 27, 2005

Today was good. I worked this morning.

Gib is in the hospital on IVs. They are almost positive that it is Dangey (?) fever. Joanne leaves Saturday to the States to raise some support for the construction of the home in Monjas. They feel that this is just an attack and so they don't want to hinder what God has planned to give them.

Also, tonight little Ana jumped off of the top bunk and broke her leg. She is in the hospital tonight. Poor thing. All of the girls are in an uproar with all the drama. :)

So, it has been a different day, to say the least. But it has been good.

Thanks for your prayers.

Wednesday, January 26, 2005

Urgent prayer request

Gib Simpson, who along with his wife Joanne, run the Shadow of His Wings girls' home, has come down with what they think is dangey fever. (I spell it like it sounds) This is contracted from a mosquito that is around in the daytime, unlike other mosquitos who more commonly come out at night. It is related to malaria. He has had an extremely high fever and cannot keep anything down. He has just today started vomiting violantly. He was in Monjas, about 3 hours from the city, so Melvin and Carroll went to get them (Joanne can't drive because of a shoulder injury) and they brought them to the city to a hospital. That's all I know for now. I will update when I can. Please pray for God's Will.

A tribute to a wonderful mother

Tonight, two years ago, was the worst night of my life. My sisters and I sat and watched our moma pass into the arms of Jesus. It was actually about 3am on Monday, the 27th, but that whole weekend was horrible. I only say it was a bad night for the rest of us. I can't imagine how wonderful it was for my moma. She had been sick for over 5 years and for the months prior to her death, she was in horrible, miserable health. It was hard for us as a family to watch her in such pain, day in and day out, but I would've taken it all to myself if I could have. I know my sisters and my grandmother feel exactly the same. I miss moma so much. Sometimes I would give anything to see her again, even for only a moment. I want to call her and tell her things that are going on in my life. I want to see her laugh so hard at some stupid TV show that she cries. I want her to cook breakfast for us the way she did some weekends; even though it was only the two of us, she would cook so much food and we would always eat it all. I guess she never really got used to cooking for only two, because we always had leftovers of everything. I want to ride to work with her and listen to her tell me crazy stories about some of the patients. If she ever went to the store, she would ALWAYS bring me a prize, even when I was older. My sister does that for me now. Everyone loved my moma. She was the kindest person I ever knew. She had the best laugh. I want to hear her voice. I know everyone thinks this, but I had the best. I know now that she is no more pain and that one day I will see her again and we will sing for Eternity in the presence of our Savior. What a great hope. What would I do without that? It would be unbearable. I don't know why God decided to take her so soon, but I am thankful that I had her as mine for 23 years. I am very proud of her and her life. I hope I can be just like her when I am a mother some day. My sisters already are.

Sunday, January 23, 2005

Me Robaste el Corazon




















You stole my heart

You took my life as your own

Your lips bring forth honey

and your sweet voice cradles me

It's beautiful to be asleep

with heart wide awake

it's so good to see you

it's so sweet to hear

you, only you

hope, my love

you are in the colors

of the roses than bloom

you are in my songs

in the wind, in the sea

you stole my heart

Although I stay in the forgotten

and I like to be this way

with my heart in love with you

This is the most beautiful love song I have ever heard by a Christian singer Alex Campos. I bought the cd. Can you imagine being so in love with Jesus that something like this comes from your heart? It has become the theme song of this house, especially with the older girls. I already learned it on the guitar. :)

humility. great, isn't it?

Tonight was a great night. Jeanette and Claudia did a skit with the girls upstairs, while I helped Miriam make a 'cornflakes' cereal box out of the gift box my sister, Stephanie, sent my Christmas present in. She has had to make some of the wierdest things since she started school. The first night she was making a box into a frog to keep things in at school. The cornflakes box was for papers. Who knows? They are creative though. I give them that.

We helped the girls iron their blouses for school. Sindy shined my shoes and I ironed her uniform. Good trade, eh?

Celeste and Bàrbara were arguing on whose turn it was to iron and I interupted to calm things down. Celeste has this voice that she uses that is the whiniest thing you have ever heard. She's not the only one, but today I had heard this same voice from her six different times. So, I told her not to talk to me in that voice anymore. I didn't like to hear any of the girls talk to me or anyone else like that, and that she had done it a lot today. Well, I saw right away that I hurt her feelings. I tried to apologize, but she wouldn't listen. Then she hid her face and started to cry. Understand that this is the biggest tomboy in the house. She doesn't cry for just anything. I've never even seen her cry. I immedietely felt horrible. Still trying to apologize, as she fought to get away. I asked her forgiveness, with no response. I decided it was best to let her calm down a little first. Then she went to her bed, threw her uniform on the floor and cried. I couldn't hold it in anymore, so I ran to the bathroom and cried too. I couldn't stand that fact that I had hurt her feelings like that. It hurt me. A while later, I saw she wasn't in her bed, so I took her uniform and ironed it for her. She sent her sister in a minute later to tell me thank you and that she forgave me. Why can't we all be as merciful as these little ones?

Meanwhile, Jeanette did lice treatments to most of the girls. Then we blow dired their hair and put them to bed. They were all sad because Jeanette couldn't stay the night, so it was hard, especially for the little ones.

I am thankful to God and to these girls for a great weekend. I even bragged to them about how good they were this weekend.

Well, I'm off to bed. I've got two long days of rest ahead of me... haha!

fading stars

You ever noticed how the harder you look at the stars, the more seem to appear? I was just looking up at this beautiful Guatemalan sky and the thought popped in my head... (heh. I just almost wrote 'pooped'... heh.) But think about it: how can we see God in the little things in our lives? We have to look for Him, right? I mean, most of the time He goes un-noticed in our every day lives. We talk to Him on Sundays or at bedtime or first thing in the morning, but do we notice that He is with us as we drive to work? Or while we eat dinner? Or as we tuck in our children? (I say that like I already have children, right? But these girls have become that for me... I guess I should say little sisters, more appropriate?) Sometimes we don't even see the stars. But they are always there. Unlike the sun and moon, there are always stars in the sky. We just can't see them because there is too little or too much light shining on them. (my theory, I guess) Even in the daytime. But at night time, or in our darkest hour, is when we see them the most. hm. We don't have to look so hard. Even when it's cloudy, when God seems to have disappered, there are still stars in the sky. He is always there. What good are stars really? Do they serve a purpose that we know of? To me, they are just pretty to look at, wouldn't you agree? That is how God's blessings are. If He didn't give them to us, would we miss them? Can you miss something that you've never had or never known? I don't know that if we had never seen stars in our lives, if they didn't exist, that we would miss them at all. But He is so good to give us little things that please us. He loves to make us happy. You know another thing about stars? They are constant. They never change position. (as far as I know, but for my story we'll just say they don't, mmmk?) That also says something about our God. That He is a constant in our life. He never changes. His law nor His love will ever change. Only we have the power to ignore it. But what beauty would a night hold without stars?

time is flying

These girls are so great! I had to work alone yesterday all day, but these girls behaved beyond good all day. It was like they somehow knew, and took it easy on me. Don't get me wrong, they're not usually wild or something, but it was a very relaxing day. Thank you God!

Londy was supposed to come help out this weekend, but came down with the flu, poor thing. But today, after church, Jeanette and a friend of hers, Claudia, came by and are staying the night to help me out. :) They will never know how much I appreciate it. Just to have another presence here makes a world of difference. And they are awesome with the girls. Later this afternoon they have planned a devotion and games for the girls. It should be a fun time.

Last night, five of my girls created a drama and performed it for me. It was about 'a beautiful girl who ruined her life'. It was very good and had a good lesson of obedience, which the girls then asked me about and said that they should always obey me, just like we all should ALWAYS obey God. It was very good. They even borrowed my flashlight to create a 'discoteca', where the girl in the skit went out of disobedience. Then they choreographed a praise dance to a song by Lilly Goodman called, 'La Iglesia', which basically speaks about losing our first love, which is Christ. In the song, it is Christ saying to us, 'Return to me! Return to me!' It is very powerful. I was very blessed by it.

Tìa Elena is on vacation this week, so Melva, la abuela, will be cooking with Rosalba's help. Jim and Melva came to help out while Gib and Joanne are in Monjas. They are an older couple that are living in their house. He works in the office a lot and she does sewing, and helping whenever needed.

The first week of February, Melvin and Zaidy will be off for three weeks leaving me encargada de la casa grande. (in charge of the big house) The girls are in school, so I will get them up, and be with them in the afternoon and night. Rebeca will help on my days off. Londy and Jeanette and Jennifer will be coming to help out some on weekends too, which will be so good for me.

The week seems to fly by now. Here it is almost my day off again. I only have about a month left here. My last day will be the 20th, after my friend Marisa comes to help out a few days. Afterwards, we will go visit friends we've made here and spend time with them. I also want to take Marisa to Panajachèl and to the beach, but we'll see how it works out.

They have pretty much offered me any job I wanted, if I would come back here. They want God's will for me as much as I do, but they really want me to stay. Carroll has said I could teach English, translate for groups, be in charge of the missionary interns, or work more in the office, etc. She asked me what would be my desire. So, I will be praying for that, if you would join me in that please. I would appreciate it.

Monday, January 17, 2005

has another week gone by already?

Can you believe it's already the second week in January 2005?!? Where did last year go?

Well, here it is 6AM on my day off and I've been up already for an hour. That's always how it goes. Our girls are up and sturring getting ready for their first day back at school. We only had one girl not to pass to the next grade. She will start this year in a special class because she is believed to have some sort of mental problems keeping her from learning as fast as the others. This girl is 14 years old, and she is the same size as our 9 years olds, maybe smaller even. But if her physical immaturity has any relation to her mental maturity then it's better for her to be with a special teacher. I love her laugh!

Yesterday, we gave the girls all of their uniforms, new shoes, and socks for the school year. Even Caty, the 13 year old girl who has shut down her mind because of horrible physical abuse, recieved a uniform. She attends school only in the afternoon with a special education teacher and has been doing so well since I've been here. She has really improved so much. Carroll believes that she will be healed this year. She was so excited about her uniform. Last year she didn't have one and to be like the other girls is so big for her. But she was a little too excited because last night when she got her uniform ready for today, just like the other girls do, she had all five pairs of socks and all three blouses ready on the hanger along with her skirt and sweater... isn't that sweet? We will have to watch her though, because she likes to change clothes and I'm sure she would love to have a ball putting that uniform on just to play.

A new missionary intern, Sara, came last Monday, but will leave on Thursday. She's young and it is her first time away from home and five months is a long time. I will miss the help, but I know that God is in control.

I have about one month here before I take a week or so off here after my family arrives. Did I mention that they were coming? They are driving down a truck for the home here and should be leaving near the end of this month. Please be in prayer for them. For their safety and favor at the borders. Also, when we came last year, I was with them to translate through Mexico. I'm not worried about that because Jami is pretty good and if nothing else can pretty much understand what someone is trying to say to her. But just be in prayer for them please.

I know this last month or so is going to fly by. I'm excited to see my family, but I'm so sad to be away from here for two months. Just the country in general. I can't explain why I love it here so much. But God knows why He puts certain burdens on certain people's hearts and Guatemala is mine. Plus, I will miss the girls terribly. But I am just going to try and enjoy the rest that I can get at home. Also, I am hoping that I will be able to share a little about this testimony and this home.

My return flight is for May 14th, and that ticket was really just bought out of faith... (and hope) that I would be returning to something. I'm not sure yet whether it will be here at the Shadow of His Wings or somewhere else. I do have a specific desire on my heart, but God is teaching me to just pray to Him about it and let Him do the work. I think it's going to be so cool when He shows me His plan for me in May. These girls really want me to come back here. They want me to be here forever. But I assure them that even if I'm not living here, that it doesn't mean that I won't come see them every chance I get. I really have grown a special love for these girls. I was actually just thinking about that this morning, lying in bed at 5AM. The new girl was making breakfast and it is her first time to make the cream of wheat period, let alone by herself (which is my specialty :) And I wanted so bad to get up three hours earlier than I had planned, so I could help her. Not so much to help her, but I was worried about what the girls were going to have to eat. Cream of wheat is hard, especially on that big of a scale (25 people). I don't say that to sound mean, like I didn't want to help her, but my main concern was the girls. I just happened to notice my thoughts and the reasons for them and I thought it was neat. Is that how a mother would think? Or an aunt? I can answer that second one.... YES! I imagine if it were my nephews, I would want the best for them as well. Neat, huh?

Saturday, January 15, 2005

In loving memory of Susan Milam

Today would have been my moma's 54th birthday. I just wanted to remember her every way I could. These are some of my favorite pictures of her.

Wednesday, January 12, 2005

prayer requests

First of all, I just found out that some friends of ours had their truck stolen last night. They need this truck for their ministry in San Juan Tecuaco because it is a 4WD, and a car just won't make it to their house. They do have a small car, but it has many problems and it's defintely not a 4WD. Please be in prayer that their truck will be found.

Second, Bárbara was not given her visa. She went yesterday, and they were applying to get her a visa and give legal custody to the family that is adopting her, so she could go and live with them while the adoption finishes. But at the Embassy they decided to wait and said when the adoption goes through to come back. So, I guess, please pray that the adoption would go through quickly, so she can go home to her new family and the medical attention she really desperately needs.

They new intern came on Monday. She is Sara from Texas. She is really sweet and I think we will get along well. This is her first time our of the country and her first mission trip of any kind... and she's here for 5 months! Brave girl. I believe she is around 19 years old. Also, Justin, who will become Bárbara's adoptive brother is here for about 4 months. He is from New Jersey and is also 19. I feel so old. :/

Things have been slowing down around here. Thank goodness. The girls will start school again this Monday, and things will seem to get back to normal.

My family is driving down at the end of the month. Please be praying for them. They will study Spanish for about 6 weeks and then we will all go home together. (for a visit... heheh)

Thursday, January 6, 2005

bendiciones de Dios

You know how I said last week was the hardest ever... did I say that? Well, it was... very stressful. But on the hardest day of them all... and my last day before my days off... everything was worse. But you know how good God is? Let me tell you.

Sandra comes into my room and wants to play something... she's bored. But of course, I don't feel like playing because I'm in a bad mood. But I give in and we play cards. I teach her a few games and watch her beam as she wins all by herself. Then she says to me, "I wish I could be your sister, so I could have clothes like yours. I've always wanted a big sister. All I had to play with when I was at home were older brothers." So, I said, "You know what, Sandra? I've always wanted a little sister!" She just smiled so big and hugged me. So, I said, "I can be your big sister, if you want." Again she hugged me so hard. So, we continued playing. A little while later, she said, "I was thinking and... I do want you to be my big sister." She just smiled so big. Later on that afternoon, I found a handmade card on my bed along with a hairbrush (used) and a box full of beads and a hankerchief (unused). These were her gifts to me. Isn't that sweet? So, I made her a card and gave her a barrette. She was so excited and said she would start calling me sister today (Thursday). She even saved a new pair of socks for today. It is a huge deal for this little girl. And God used her to bless me so much, I hope He can use me in the same way for her.

I had wonderful days off in Antigua. It was very relaxing. I think I'll do it again next week.

Well, I have to do dialisis now. Good night.

Sunday, January 2, 2005

Feliz 2005!!

This week has been a crazy one. What a way to end the year. We have been 'a little' (ha ha) short handed, to say the least. I was at times the only one taking care of the two houses. :/ But you know what? God never failed me. There were times I thought I would go crazy and just then He'd throw me a little blessing. He's so good. Like today for instance...; Tìa Elena usually leaves lunch for Sunday almost ready, so all we have to do when we get back from church is, for example, put the eggs on the bread for the egg sandwiches. But she was off yesterday because of the holiday, so I had to make the eggs, which was fine. But when I got back from church there was not enough bread for all the girls. But Joanne went to buy some. Then we didn't think we had enough eggs, but can you believe that we had EXACTLY enough eggs for each sandwich? Jehovah Jirah!!

The afternoon today was calmer. Jeanette came and helped out today, which was good because it would have been impossible for me to do it alone. This afternoon was more relaxed. But I am just learning not to panic and to take everything to God.

We stayed up all night New Year's Eve and watched the sky light up across the city from the fireworks. It was even more spectacular than Christmas Eve. But I'm glad the holidays are over. I'm tired. I feel like I haven't slept well. (I've been letting the older girls stay up later... my fault) So, on that note... I will go to bed now.

Saturday, January 1, 2005

December birthdays

The December birthdays included Irma, Itzel, and Dárlin. Dárlin didn't even know exactly how old she was. She thought she was turning 12, then they told her that she was actually 13... then again she was 12. Can you imagine that? Not even knowing your birthday?

Irma loved her outfit, too bad the shirt was too tight and I had to take it back. They didn't have the same style so I had to get her a pink sweater that I think she didn't like. :( Dárlin also loved her outfit. I had to take both the pants and shirt back for her. But she liked the second one even better. :) Itzel loved hers and it fit perfect!! :D